DINNER BELL FOR THE DREAM WORMS by Jason Wuchenich
Published 2010 – LegumeMan Books/94p/Trade Paperback
More information and purchasing options HERE: LegumeMan Books
I began this book with an open mind. All I knew for sure was that Legumeman Books could be counted on to surprise me. So far, the four books they have put out have been so different as to defy categorising this new Aussie publisher. First, siction from R. Frederick-Hamilton in the book ‘Spare Key’. I know a lot of people thought ‘Oooohhhh, a new publisher of extreme horror’, but they were proven wrong when Matthew Revert’s ‘A Million Versions of Right’ was released. Here we had absurdist/bizarro rants of a diseased mind. Then came ‘Archelon Ranch’ by Bizarro author Garrett Cook, which I have not indulged in quite yet.
And then came Wookie, better known as Jason Wuchenich. Oh my God!
Like I said earlier, I began this book with an open mind, and soon enough I was lucky not to be continuing it with an empty stomach.
‘Dinner Bell for the Dream Worms’ consists of two tales, the first being the story of Lemmy, an incubus with a severe flatulence issue. Y’see, incubi need something to bring them from their own plane of existence to our level of reality in their physical form. In Lemmy’s case, he needs to fart to appear with us as a solid being of matter. To ensure he always has the necessary fuel to enable such a fart…er…feat, Lemmy restricts his diet to shit…yep, that’s right. He eats shit! Scat in all its forms; fresh, dry, old, still steaming from the sphincter, runny or as hard as jerky. He’ll eat shit all day long and half the night as well.
And he’ll LOVE IT!
Lemmy is a character that you really like from pretty much the moment you meet him. He saves this work from being just another potential entry for the WHC Gross Out Competition and channels it into a charming anecdote extolling both the power of love and the greatness of personal hygiene. Lemmy is so damn full of charm (not to mention faeces) that it’s impossible not to like him. He also manages to turn this faeces-filled tale into a charming love story. The characters are vivid and outrageous, the situations are delightful, the concept is quite well articulated and the dining experiences espoused therein are quite disgusting. Great tale of love, loss, humility and shit-sandwiches.
7.5/10 for Stinky Incubus. Well done, Wookie!
Part Two of the book is the apocalyptic tale Skank Clusters: For Sale!!
This second story is a little more grounded in reality, although still very out-there. Skank-clusters are the new taste sensation. Barely described so as our own sick minds can fill in the details, Skank Clusters are the newest confectionery to hit the market, taking the world by storm.
But there is a downside.
Sweet and delicious they may be, but they are also extremely addictive. They compel addicts to perform acts that are both unsavoury and unhygienic. The President of the US dresses like a skank and flashes passing cars on Pennsylvania Avenue, the Prime Minister of England is busted fellating transvestites (and enjoying it immensely) and the world rapidly falls apart as skank-like behaviour reigns supreme. It is left up to our two anti-heroes, Tuggy and Raster, to save mankind from trailer-trash Armageddon. I think I enjoyed the first story a little bit more than this one, but it was a hard call. Again, Wookie’s writing is charming, taking the head off the revolting subject matter. Short and sweet, this tale is satisfying with an unexpected ending.
7/10 for Skank Clusters: For Sale!!
So, all up and rounded down, a 7/10 rating for Jason Wuchenich’s ‘Dinner Bell for the Dream Worms’.
And a small message for Wookie…
Ay, you loco gringo, wasa fucksa matter wit chu?
Great Book, Jason! 😀